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Posts tagged ‘moving on after a break up’

ex28Alanis knew it was time to move on.  Break up with her boyfriend Harry had just happened. She knew there was no chance of getting back together with her boyfriend, so she had to get on with her life.

First, Alanis tried talking to her friends about the break up.  At first, they were sympathetic.  But after few days, they became bored with the topic and wanted to talk about their own issues instead of her.  Alanis became frustrated at their lack of support.

Her mom, on the other hand, couldn’t talk about anything but Harry.  She thought Alanis was insane to let her wonderful boyfriend get away.  It sometimes seemed like her mom had been more in love with Harry than Alanis ever was.

After a few weeks, Alanis decided to go to a therapist for five sessions.  Over the course of a few weeks, she began to identify the problems which had led to her break up with Harry and plan out a strategy for moving on in her life.

The first thing she did was to for the moving on break up was to get rid of all of Harry’s things.  Some, like the blue jacket he loved, she gave back.  Other things like his toothbrush she just threw away.  And, he had given her some nice jewelry, but she decided to box these up and store them until she became less emotional about him.

Next, she started doing things that she didn’t feel comfortable doing when Harry was around.  For example, Harry would never go to the ballet with her.  Alanis had trained as a classical dancer and she appreciated Swan Lake and Giselle.  When a performance came to town, she got a couple of girlfriends together and they went to see it.  This is not something she would have done if she had been together with Harry.

She also decided to join an adult dance class.  Partially, it got her out of the house three nights a week.  It also got her back into shape.  But, she was able to meet new people as well.  She liked the comraderie of the class.

She also explored new passions.  She never knew much about wines.  Harry had preferred beer and she had usually just ordered the house white.  But when she heard a local winery was offering a wine tasting class, she decided to join right away.

Over the course of five weeks, she developed a palate.  She began to appreciate the difference between a young wine and an old wine.

And, she met Larry.  Larry was a good looking lawyer who was interested in good wine and fine food.  He was also interested in Alanis.

Part of how Alanis knew that she was getting over the pain of losing Harry was that she was interested in Larry very much.

Alanis doesn’t know whether the relationship with Larry is going to be long term or a short term rebound fling.  But she does know that she doesn’t miss Harry when Larry with her.  Moving on after a break up – That’s the way to do it!

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