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Archive for the ‘Marriage And Divorce Advice’ category

How To Find A Good Marriage CounselorSince marriage is in the greatest crisis in the history of marriage, we are desperately searching for a way to repair them. we’ve explored all sorts of options, from books to group session to therapy to counselors.

The most common method is hiring a marriage counselor.

Are there any secrets as to how to find a good marriage counselor?

I can give you several important hints in how to find a good marriage counselor, if you are sure that a counselor is the best chance for your marriage.

Most importantly, you need to decide what is most important about to you personally. Let me explain what I mean.

Some people just feel like they need to talk and someone needs to listen. Others want a mediator to sit between you and your spouse and..well, MEDIATE. Others want someone to tell them what to do.

What do you want?

This is very important for you to define this for yourself as part of how to find a good marriage counselor for your specific needs.

Nest, you also need to define your values. Are you against divorce? How to you feel about separation? These may seem like dumb questions, but let me give you a few stories to help explain how to find a good marriage counselor for YOU.

I knew a couple that went to a counselor. He suggested that they each have an affair and then see if that changed how they felt for each other. Ummm…

Another counselor insisted to a couple that divorce was the only answer, while the couples religious views prohibited divorce.

Another couple saw a counselor that insisted on mediating, when the wife just needed a neutral person to talk to about how she was feeling.

So all of these personal values and objectives play a HUGE part in how to find a good marriage counselor.

Every marriage counselor is probably good in one area or another. But not ever counselor will be good FOR YOU.

In fact, if you think about it, what you really need to do to save your marriage is to learn to communicate with your spouse honestly, respectfully and frequently (something that Lee H Baucom for example explains in great details inside his Save The Marriage ebook).

When you improve in these areas, many of your relationship problems will begin to disappear. WHile you decide how to find a good marriage counselor, maybe it would help you (well, I KNOW it will help, I’m just being polite!) to apply these few communication tips.

Take 5 minutes each day to be alone with your spouse to talk. Make it your goal to share one joke, funny quote or one happy memory that you had together.

After a week, add another 5 minute conversation session. You can prepare 5 questions for your spouse. They should be questions like “What would you do if you could learn anything you wanted? What sport would you like to do if you had the time? What kind of songs would you write if you were a musician?” These are ‘get to know your mate,’ type of questions. These types of questions help you discover your mate all over again and help reestablish broken communication channels.

I hope these tips for how to find a good marriage counselor will help you, and best wishes to you!

Hi everyone,can you save your marrige

In this post I will try to help you understand if you can save your marriage or not. As you already know, a married relationship is an extremely important and sacred pact between a couple.

We’re elevated to think that when individuals vows are taken we are able to trust our spouse for that relaxation in our lives. However this doesn’t always go as we might hope.

Since none people can read minds we never can truly have a friend. In addition people change with time, therefore the person you fell deeply in love with might be someone entirely different today.

Even when both of you love each other, occasions change and also you might grow bored with similar old routine. Because of this , for many matters, one spouse simply develops fed up with the dull routine and wishes to try different things.

Even though it is not even close to acceptable it’s understandable and understanding is the initial step to healing your marriage.

While many people would finish their marriage following this act of unfaithfulness, people frequently still love one another and may want to salvage their relationship despite this error.

But how will you have confidence in them again once they back stabbed you prefer this? You swore to become faithful plus they discontinued with another person. Well you will find certain steps you can take to assist mend the wound.

To begin with, don’t accept excuses. Simply because you are prepared to forgive and move ahead does not necessarily mean you need to just no way and allow them to free. They messed up, in a major way, and they have to admit their mistake for the relationship to operate.

When they would like your relationship to operate they is going to do this, otherwise they might not be as serious when you are.

Another a part of not accepting some half hearted apology would be to remember the word “actions speak even louder then words”. In case your spouse is really sorry and wishes to make amends, they’ll stop all connection with the individual they scammed with.

When they refuse to get this done, or still begin to see the person, they most likely aren’t as sorry because they brought you to definitely believe and you might like to simply reduce your deficits and move ahead together with your existence.

Also, don’t play down yourself. Many people blame themselves for his or her partners affair, thinking they have to did a problem they are driving their partner to such measures. Don’t do that, it had been their mistake not yours.

When they were built with a problem they ought to have spoken along with you about this rather than running off into another person’s mattress.

Lastly, whether you forgive them or move ahead, always hold your mind high. You aren’t to blame with this and also you deserve better. Whether you receive that out of your spouse or someone down the road can be you.

There’s no law saying you need to stick with them when they won’t change. Be understanding and cooperative, but not be a doormat.

As lengthy while you try your very best to create things work, so that as lengthy as the spouse realizes their mistake and tries too, things will frequently exercise ultimately.

I hope that this post was helpful and useful for you, all the best!

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Save My Marriage Today

Lee Baucom Save The Marriage

Trying to learn how to save your marriage alone can be very hard. It’s not easy when you feel that you’re the only person who finds the marriage precious enough to save. In case no amount of persuasion makes your partner want to help you save the marriage, how you can do it alone?

Well, it’s true that saving your marriage alone is not easy, however it is possible and many people did it before.

In this post I will share with you some important tips that I think you should use:

Tip Number 1 To Save The Marriage Alone – Stay Calm

If you are trying to save your marriage alone, you will probably feel very upset about the situation. However, if you want to fix the marriage problem and win your spouse back, then you need to be calm and to have a good plan. In order to figure out a good plan as mentioned, you must eliminate any bad feelings you have in your mind right now. Try to forget about any bad things that had happened for you in the past. Try to clear everything out. After that, you can concentrate and think about the best ways to save your marriage alone.

Tip Number 2 To Save The Marriage Alone – Start Getting to Know Your Partner Again

It’s true that you know your spouse well, probably even better than anyone else in the world, but that does not mean you know everything. Remember when you first fall in love with your partner and you needed to know anything about him or her? Well, you do not have to get that back, but you should really try to remember that interest and start getting to know your partner once again.

Tip Number 3 To Save The Marriage Alone – Take Action

The only way you can save your marriage is through concerted effort. Thinking about making the effort doesn’t count and will not help you.

Tip Number 4 To Save The Marriage Alone – Surprise Your Spouse

Surprising your spouse can really help you to save your marriage.
You could surprise your partner with tickets to a movie or even to set a day where both of you enjoy something together. you should do things to surprise your spouse in order to make each day different than the one before, something that can really help any couple including you and your spouse.

Tip Number 5 To Save The Marriage Alone – Be Kind And Listen

Listening is with no doubt one of the most effective ways to improve any communication between two people. A breakdown in the communication is usually one of the biggest causes for divorce. Try to be kind to your partner and do things that he or she wouldn’t normally expect. It can be something very simple like washing the dishes before they have the chance or even cooking their favorite meal. By doing so you will get the reward of the love slowly coming back from your spouse. However, don’t over do this as you may get taken granted for and end up becoming subservient to your spouse.

Tip Number 6 To Save The Marriage Alone – Always Seek For Professional Help

Usually, the people close to you will not offer objective perspectives and advice. Try to talk with your spouse and tell him or her about your desire for counseling. Make sure to let them know that the marriage counselor can be anyone they feel comfortable with. In case your spouse refuses, try to explain to them that you will attend alone.

These tips are not a “magic formula”, however they can really help you to save your marriage alone and I hope that they will help you soon!

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Save My Marriage Today

Lee Baucom Save The Marriage

If your marriage is on the brick of disaster and you feel like you are the only side that wants to make it work then you are not alone.
These days there are many people like you who try to save their marriage from divorce alone.

It’s not easy to save your marriage alone, however it is really possible and in this post I want to share with you some tips that can help you to do it even if the situation seems hopeless now.

Listed below are 7 tips to save your marriage alone:

Talk Openly With Your Spouse

The very first thing you need to do if you’re trying to rekindle the flame between you and your partner is to address the issues that are weakening your marriage. The best way to do it is simply talking openly with your partner, and both of you should be accepting your own part in the current situation.

Remember that without communication with your partner no marriage can survive. Communication is the most fundamental building block toward success in any kind of marriage life, including yours.

Think Alone About The Problems

While it is very important to talk about the problems with your partner you should also take some time to think about the cause of your marriage problems. Ask yourself, “what is the cause that lead to the marriage problems I’m experiencing at this moment? If you know the cause, it will be very easy to find the right solution to solve your problem. Don’t avoid this tip, it is considered to be a very powerful when talking on how to save your marriage alone.

Don’t Try To Change Your Partner

When you live with a partner for a while it becomes easy to spot his or her flaws and shortcomings. Some of the people take it a step further and tell their partners what their problems are and what they should do to change their behavior just for us. Don’t do it, It will only make the matters worse.

Patience Is Required

One more thing that you must realize is that it is going to take a tad bit of patience when you are trying to save the marriage alone. Why? Because if you want to save your marriage you need to make your spouse want you back. Now this is not going to happen quickly and you may need to take two step backwards before you can take one step forward. So don’t forget to be patience with your partner and have a plan.

Feedback From Trusted Sources Is Very Important

In order to save your marriage alone it can be very helpful to discuss the relationship with people close to you. Getting an honest opinion about the future of your marriage from a 3rd party can be quite enlightening. In fact, I will highly recommend to get as much feedback as you can. You may discover that in the eyes of many other people, the marriage is not worth saving. This is why it is wise to listen to their opinions.

Get Advice From A Relationship Expert

Go out and get your hands on some expert guidance by an experienced relationship professional that has made studying marriages and divorce a career. It can really help you to save your marriage from divorce alone, and remember that even though you might be a very smart person, you are not a professional in this field.

Don’t Lose Faith

Always think positively and keep a positive outlook on life even if the situation seems hopeless. Good things will come back to you in time. Remember that a failing marriage is not something you can fix over time. It will take extra effort and courage if you trying to save your marriage alone. If you won’t lose faith then you will succeed if you really want to.

If you still love your spouse and want to save your marriage alone remember that it is possible no matter what you may feel right now.
I hope that these tips on how to save your marriage alone will be helpful for you, all the best!

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Save The Marriage

Save My Marriage Today

At the time of marriage, many women perceive life to be a bed of roses wherein life after marriage will simply be ‘happily ever after’ for the rest of their lives. Unfortunately, it is not always like that.

Every couple will go through the sweetest period of the beginning and slowly give way or slack when things are working in a monotonous manner. It’s true that you got your man to fall in love with you, but knowing how to keep your husband in love with you endlessly is something that you must learn.

Below are some useful tips on how to make your husband love you:

Tip number 1 to make your husband love you – Don’t share all your feelings

Most of women are wired to be very open with what we’re feeling. They want their man to be aware of what’s going on with them, whether we’re feeling angry, sad, disappointed, frustrated or overjoyed.

If you tell the man in your life everything, he’ll become less engaged. It is better to keep some things to yourself and to make yourself a wee bit mysterious.

Your man will respect you more if you share less all the time. That’s not to say you shouldn’t bring up an issue if it’s tearing you apart emotionally inside, but it does mean, you need to be more mindful of what and when you share.

Tip number 2 to make your husband love you – Respect your husband

Another important thing that you must remember is that you need to respect your husband as an individual. Respect is what they crave for you and will give in return if they get it. Value his words and his presence and tell him so as well.

It is very important that you accept your husband with all his faults and follies. Remember that No one is perfect and each one has his credits and falls.

Tip number 3 to make your husband love you – Have a mind of your own

A man loves a woman deeply when she shows the best of herself. If you want to make your husband love you back, you must show him that you are someone who is capable to take care of herself. This is one of the most important things that you must understand if you want to make your husband love you a lot.

I hope that these tips on how to make your husband love you were helpful, good luck!

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Can I make my wife love me again? This is a common question among many husbands facing relationship issues with their wife.
After the first couple of years in many marriages, one of the sides begin to somewhat lose interest and make the other doubtful of the future of the marriage. If you are a husband who wonders “how can I make my wife love me again”, then this post is for you.

Below are some tips that can help you make your wife love you again:

Tip number 1 on how to make your wife love you again – Identify the problem

The first step to do when make you want your wife love you again is to identify the problem. What has happened to the relationship to put a chill in the relationship and harden your wife’s heart toward you?

Do not feel bad or stupid if you do not know, many men are clueless when it comes to what they have done wrong. In fact, some of what you did wrong may only exist in her mind, but nevertheless, it is real to her.

Take responsibility for what you have done wrong and what you could have done better. No one is perfect and there is no shame in having faults.

Tip number 2 on how to make your wife love you again – Build the trust and start the relationship all over again

It is very important to start the relationship all over again and go through the process of understanding each other. Try to regain your wife confidence slowly and make her trust you again. Most of the chances are that your wife still loves you. If not, she would not marry you in the first place. You can better the marriage by improving the flaws found in the relationship.

Tip number 3 on how to make your wife love you again – Show her that you love her

Flowers are a great way to show someone that you care about him. You don’t have to spend a lot of money on a dozen roses or anything like that, but a beautiful bunch of nice smelling flowers will do the job and show your wife that you do still love her.

Also, when your wife does something special, or looks nice, tell her! She’s not a mind reader, and women do need to hear that they are loved, and appreciated.

I hope that these tips on how to make your wife love you again were helpful for you, all the best!

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If you wonder “how can I make him to love me again” this post is for you.

Every relationship will go through periods of rough seas. While some will be able to get through their problems with ease, others will feel a serious strain on their relationship. Those who are going through an incredibly rough period in their relationship need to make sure that they are doing what they can to keep the love in the relationship.

Unfortunately, some will not be as lucky as others. Some will find that their boyfriend or husband has simply fallen out of love with them. While this can cause serious problems with the relationship, it does not have to be the end of the relationship. Some hearts can be won back. If you find yourself wondering “can I make him fall in love with me again?” you need to evaluate your situation. Here are different things that can help you to get him back.

Gauge your Current Contact

Think about the last few encounters that you have had with your boyfriend or husband. Have you still had times that have been enjoyable? These are clear signals that he still enjoys being around you, an important sign for those who are trying to get their boyfriend to love them again.

Talk to His Friends

One of the best places to find out about his feelings for you will be through his close friends. If you have a close, common friend, talk to them about your issues. They may be able to tell you whether or not he is thinking about you, and if he is thinking about trying to work things out with you.

Don’t Avoid the Topic

The worst thing that you can do when trying to make your boyfriend or husband fall in love with you again is to avoid the topic. If you know that there are problems in your relationship, you need to confront them. Avoiding the topic will simply put off the inevitable; you need to discuss your issues if you want to have any chance of getting back into his heart.

While people tend to think of the things that they need to do in order to win back the heart of their man, they fail to think about the things that they shouldn’t do. More often than not, the things that you don’t do will speak louder than the things that you actually do. If you are asking yourself, “can I make him love me again”, you need to avoid these four things. By doing so, you are giving your relationship a second chance.

I hope that these tips will be helpful for you, all the best.

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Do you wish to find out the right way to win your husband back after he left you from any reason? Many ladies do not know exactly what should they do in this situation and because of that many relationships come to end.
Nonetheless there are different things you are able to do to get your husband back in love with you if you are determined to save your relationship and keep your household together.
Listed below are some suggestions that may help you to win your husband back:

The very first move is to agree with your break up with your husband. Sure, it can be very difficult for you at first to agree upon this fact. But trust me the moment you’re starting to accept this break up truth then automatically you will stop doing text message bombardment and cold calling to your ex husband. You’ll feel much more relaxed and comfortable in your every day life activities.

The second step is to look into the marriage and discover the real cause for this break up. I am unable to tell you what’s it, but I am certain it is much bigger then your fight and you must find it. You may read some books or ask for guidance from your friends. I’ll give you some ideas – do you show your husband love? Are you sure he feels you respect him? So many couples forget that for love you need to work and it takes some effort to maintain the relationship!

One other step you should do if you wish to get your husband back is to make him your priority again. Think back to early in your relationship and how you viewed his place in your life. You want to recreate that so he feels how important he actually is to you. This can be a bit challenging for ladies who’ve children, but you must make it happen. You can apply it by planning alone time for just you and your spouse. Enlist the help of relations or friends.

Don’t forget to be patient. Lots of suggestions on saving a marriage can’t happen overnight as these are not quick fixes. You must understand that it is possible to get your husband back to your arms but it takes time.

I hope that these will be helpful for you, all the best!

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Pull Your Ex Back Review
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Are you going through a divorce or on the brink of go through a divorce with your husband? If so, are you still love your husband? Maybe you want to win him back. Well, do not give up hope now since there are different things that you are able to do to win him back. Whereas fixing a marriage that has had problems can definitely take some work, if you are strong-minded that you are going to win him back and fix the marriage, it can work.

Listed below are some helpful ideas that can help you get your husband back:

Understand Why Your husband Left In The First Place

The first tip comes in the form of a question, “Why did he leave in the first place”? It isn’t possible, until you realize why he left, that you can bring him back to you. Relax and do some soul-searching. If it wasn’t something obvious like he cheated or else you cheated, then you might need to determine what in the marriage altered that affected your husband so greatly that he felt the necessity to leave you.

Do not use the children as a ploy

Many ladies fall into this catch. They throw the kids at their husbands during a separation. They make him feel like he’s the one hurting the kids. The children are hurting, however it’s both of you. Do not drag the kids into the mess. Be civil throughout visitation exchanges. Do not ever tell the children to send messages or else to spy.

Looks matter

It doesn’t matter what anybody tells you, your look matter when it comes to guys being interested in you and that includes your husband. Think about your best self and the way you want to look and make it happen. This isn’t to say it’s best to get any kind of surgery performed, but in the event you think you will look totally amazing after dropping six more pounds then do it. You’ll thank your exercising habits later.

Another thing that I must say: be sure you really want your husband back before you try so hard to get him. Sometimes we’re scared to be alone so we reach out to what’s familiar. Normally a separation does not come as a shock to either party. Use the time to really determine what is best for all involved, whether or not that is togetherness or not.
When you decide that you really want your husband back, take action and use these ideas, they’ll actually be helpful for you to to save the marriage.

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It is very hard for you when your husband leaves you, the world is shattered right into a million pieces and picking up those pieces of your life seems an unattainable task.
However, the fact that your husband has left you for another lady does not mean that you can’t win him back. It merely shows that you must put in the needed effort to ensure that your husband comes running back to you. Though it’s much easier said than accomplished, the ideas listed here will help you immensely in making sure that you do win your husband back to you.

Acknowledge your part in your break-up

Being the 1st to admit you were wrong is not going to make you smaller in anyway and it certainly will help in calming your husband down.

Be Cool

Don’t begin getting pushy or angry and do not play the blame game. Don’t put undue stress on him by insisting that he return back to your arms. These actions will only serve to push your husband farther away. Take it one step at a time.

Seek for counseling and guidance

There are times when we can’t do it alone. To get your husband back is going to be an uphill slog so prepare yourself and no matter what you don’t quit midway. The hurt and pain needs time to heal, it doesn’t occur over night so do not be upset if your husband isn’t prepared to forgive and forget, and jump right back into your open arms.

Lastly, you must prepare yourself for some changes. Perhaps your husband doesn’t respect the fact that you spend too much time at work and give little attention to the house, the family, the kids, and to him! Maybe, you’ve forgone the care that you took for yourself in keeping yourself well groomed and attired while he was courting you – which is why he simply does not find you attractive any more. So, if you want to win your husband back to your arms, it will be a good thing to work on yourself and prepare to change yourself at least a bit in case you really want your husband to change and mend his ways.

These are simply a few of the steps that I used in getting my husband back. It was helpful for me and I know it can be just right for you too. I hope that this advice will enable you to get your husband back to you very soon, good luck.

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